It sounds pretty cringey, but it’s true what people say, that older you get the more confident you get.
I’ve spent most of my teenage to *young* adult life being pretty insecure, to the point when getting dressed would ruin my mood. I can’t be the only girl who has been in her room crying before a night out, when the rest of the gang are downstairs pre-drinking just because I felt fat in everything? This has happened too many times for me to count, each time my friends having to take it in turns to find me something to wear and coax me out of my room. It’s never helped that I have always been surrounded by the prettiest girls with the best figures, because comparison naturally floats in. As natural as it is, comparison really is the thief of joy. You can feel great until you see someone else, and you instantly compare yourself to them and bam, you feel like crap. As I’m getting older, and my body is changing its shape, I have begun to see myself differently, and become more at peace with it. To start with, one of the main things I tell myself is that my insides have got to go somewhere! All those organs that keep me alive have to have space to do their thing. We’re not natural supposed to be stick thin, how could we possibly be when there’s so much going on inside of us!
Another thing I believe is that everyone has their own natural shape. Some people are slim, some are rounder, some are pear shaped and some are hourglass shaped, and this is all down to genetics! We can try our hardest to change our shape, which we might do after lots of work at the gym and dieting, but in the end, we’re naturally going to go back to OUR shape. And that’s okay! Everyone having their own shape is nice, it makes everyone different. Imagine if we were all the same shape, we would be comparing each other even more! Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying we shouldn’t try and be healthy because there’s no point, I’m saying we should be keeping healthy to feel better, not to look better. I know this isn’t new news, but not paying attention to the scales does wonders. Scales don’t tell you what the mirror tells you. They don’t tell you that you have a great waist, great boobs and strong arms, they tell you that you should probably technically loose weight. They’re just numbers that don’t do anything but make you feel sad. If you’re on a diet or going to the gym, you shouldn’t get hung up that you haven’t lost any weight because in reality you have probably toned up and built some muscle! It’s about how you feel in clothes, not how much you weigh in clothes!
I used to spend so long in the mirror, twisting in every angle to see how fat I looked. But why? Why was I pointing out my round tummy and chunky legs to myself? I don’t know either but it didn’t make me feel any better. Whenever I saw someone my size walking around in an outfit I wanted to wear, I would admire how they could wear it and not care. I’m saying this like it’s a massive deal what you look like in clothes, when it really isn’t…I remember watching 500 Days of Summer years ago, and seeing Zoe Deschanel wear a mini skirt or something and noticing her stomach was’t completely flat. To me, she was super skinny and I was pinning to look like her, when in reality, she was pretty normal and had a tummy just like the majority of the world. I realised that nobody was looking at her and thinking ‘oh she’s fat’, so why would they be thinking that about me? Can I also comment on how horrible the word fat is, and that it should be made illegal.
Recently, I have recently just been wearing outfits that I like, and that I think I look good in. Yeah, they might be a little bit unflattering like those Next wide leg jeans that I can’t seem to wear but so what?! I’m comfy and I feel confident, and if anyone else has a problem with that then that’s their problem!
At the end of the day, just do you, and wear what makes you feel good. Whether that might be a sparkly jumpsuit, a a mini skirt and a crop top or a baggy hoodie. Want to hide your wobbly bits? That’s fine too! You’re the only one that knows what’s under your cute outfit, and guess what, you’re the only one that cares about it too! And if anyone else does see them, well they’re the lucky ones if you get my drift…